I can only equate it to the feeling you get as a kid, when you see the school bus rumbling up your hill for the first time as the summer comes to a close. “Practice runs” they called them. As the yellow-monstrosity you’ll be greeting five mornings a week for the next year rumbles noisily past your front yard, the OtterPop in your hand turns sour and a cloud blocks out the sun – its coming. School. They’re practicing for it.
Ironically, I get a similar feeling in my stomach when I imagine the antithesis of this: Graduation. Though there is still time before that fateful day, it is close enough that I am beginning to feel the weight of responsibility that will come to me on that day. Having completed four years of higher education, I am now on my own. I now have the faculties to find a job and a place to live, to provide my own food and transportation, to build relationships, and become a responsible member of society.
Yet, this process of entering into a new phase of life has brought with it a lot of questions. What do I really want to do? What can I already do? Will what I can do, take me to what I want to do? How do I get there? When? So on and so forth to the point where you almost forget you still have classes to finish. “Senioritis” in this case has brought a keen awareness of the unknown that awaits me after those final steps across the graduation stage.
Through transferring schools, European adventures and internships in both churches and prisons, I’ve learned how to jump into an unknown situation with both feet. Through insecurities about specific job skills– as a Communications major, my latest mantra has been “I can do everything. And absolutely nothing” – and reading job description after job description, I’m learning to adapt to this next adventure, and embrace with it all of the “new” that comes along with it.
Such is the purpose of this blog – to embrace the adventure, and start me on my way towards however life decides to RSVP (thanks for the catch phrase, AP). You’ll get updates on how the job hunt is going, as well as reports on recent explorations into new things (cooking, new restaurants, new movies and new getaways) in order to develop a bit of a “writing sample” for future employers to take a gander at.
The name of the blog, “Treading the Soil of the Moon” came from a quotation I found while perusing sayings on “discovery” and “exploration” for a little garnish alongside my own words on the matter.
“Treading the soil of the moon, palpitating its pebbles, tasting the panic and splendor of the event, feeling in the pit of one's stomach the separation from terra - these form the most romantic sensation an explorer has ever known”
~ Vladimir Nabokov
I not only enjoyed Mr. Nabokov’s eloquence, but I found it to be an image I could identify with. Taking a step out of what you know, onto unknown soil, where new and exhilarating sensations abound. As usual, I’ll employ yet another quotation, to bring us home:
“The path to our destination is not always a straight one. We go down the wrong road, we get lost, we turn back. Maybe it doesn’t matter which road we embark on. Maybe what matters is that we embark”
~ Barbara Hall, Northern Exposure
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